Muted Lunacy

You are browsing the archives of 2006 August.

Just to let everyone know that I haven’t abandoned this journal, it’s just that I need to find time alone to make entries here and that’s just extremely hard to come by (time alone that is). And it seems lately that when I have gotten a rare minute to myself I can’t make [...]

I manage. I get through the days and I don’t really know how. I have to put on a good show so everyone around me feels comfortable. If I do slip they are quick to point out all my faults. So yeah, I manage. But I gotta tell ya, it’s [...]

I don’t know where to begin. My mind is so jumbled right now I can’t seem to make sense of anything. I guess I need to know the answer to the question of “Why am I to never be considered?” What I want, feel or need never seems to come into play. What did I [...]

What cause for mirth or gaiety could there ever be in such a horrendous place as this?

I am so fucking sick and tired of being squelched because of other people. Strangers. I get ragged on because I don’t share my feelings, but when I do and get into it I get told to keep it down (shhhhhhhh) because of the neighbors. They might hear us. SO WHAT!!!!!!!! Why is everyone else [...]

I found this old journal entry written in March of 2003. It’s interesting how something you thought was going to help ended up making things tons worse. I’m refering specifically to the italicized bit below. See I always believed that my sister would be there for me if and when I really [...]

I am no longer allowed to express any emotion anywhere.
I haven’t been allowed to at work for awhile now, because some of the dumbass pussy cunts that work here get offended. They’re sensitive I’m told. Well FUCK THEM!!!!! Guess what? I’m sensitive too. Does that count for anything? No. Okay, rules understood and will be [...]

I find myself in a very dark place now and there doesn’t seem to be any light at the end of the tunnel. No, that’s not entirely true. There is a light way down the end but it’s not necessarly salvation. Because once I do reach that light (IF I reach it) it will be [...]

I found these posts in my archives and figured this would be a good place to put them. Gives a bit of insight into me I guess.
Confessions of a Neurotic
3/28/97
I’d like to introduce myself and for reasons of privacy I’ll call myself #2. Suprisingly the privacy issue isn’t from the general public [...]

I just wanted to start this off by introducing myself and explaining a bit of what I have planned for this blog.
First off, my name is No One. Hi. I chose that nickname because I realized that that is exactly who I am, who I always was and who I always will be…no one. [...]