Muted Lunacy

I find myself in a very dark place now and there doesn’t seem to be any light at the end of the tunnel. No, that’s not entirely true. There is a light way down the end but it’s not necessarly salvation. Because once I do reach that light (IF I reach it) it will be dimmed by the guilt I’ll feel at the relief of having reached it. The problem is in how I get to it, what has to happen and how much I realized I’m waiting for it. All I can say at this point is shame on me. And may God forgive me for it.